“She’s gaining weight!”
“Does she think she can get that role with that face?”
I used to think things like this.
As actors and humans, we have the tendency to want to tear each other down. Especially as women, it’s so easy to let cattiness and immaturity seep in. When you put in the elements of a woman looking to advance a career where you’re on camera more than half the time, where the way you look really does matter, it seems like as women, we can’t do anything right.
I’ve dealt with a lot of rejection as an actress. There has also been a lot of acceptance. I would even go so far to say that there is admiration. The admiration comes from people who are not chasing that same career, but maybe wanted to at least a little bit. Throughout my somewhat slow journey, I’ve found it’s easy to be surrounded by people who are impressed with you (on the surface, anyway). It’s so crucial though, to not be surrounded by “yes people,” the people who you feel are impressed with you and who tell you what you want to hear. This is pretty much the “Big Fish in a Little Pond” Syndrome. It takes even the most unassuming, well-intentioned, young actor and turns them into a glory monster.
I’m human and capable of falling into a trap like this, but my goal is to stay humble. In acting or anything else I want to be successful with, I try to find the good things in those who are my “competition.” You never know, but at some point, you may need to work with that person or call on them to help you. The world becomes a very lonely place when we’re tearing each other down just because we want to get ahead.
People act this way because they are either afraid of what will happen if they are nice to others…or simply and most likely because they are insecure and they don’t want to strengthen anyone else, making themselves look weak. That’s no way to become great at acting. Or anything else for that matter.
Be humble or be humbled!